Photo this: It’s NSOP, and you’re that great feeling that is indescribable of liberty. I’m zigzagging my means through Carman whenever their name—we’ll call him Josh—comes up on my display by means of a notification that is snapchat. Josh and I haven’t actually talked in person before, but we now have the God-given relationship of residing in the exact same flooring; we have been profoundly linked. Appropriate? Appropriate. Hence, before i understand it, I’ve invited him back once again to my dorm and we also are experiencing a mediocre hookup. Both of us understand the hookup is mediocre even though it is occurring. Therefore after we get our clothes back on, we awkwardly hold discussion for the minutes that are few then we send him on their means.
The day that is next Josh realizes he’s forgotten something during my space. This might be objectively bad, we are going to have to do the unspeakable: see each other in broad daylight because it means. After several hours of sporadic half-hearted back-and-forth messages, we meet him when you look at the hallway of our flooring. He appears over their neck to make sure no one’s in hearing distance.
“So, are we good?” he asks.
“Yeah go! We’re fine.” My sound reaches a brand new octave.
“Okay, cool. See you around.” We weirdly find out for the question that is minute—big there—and go our split methods.
Because this strange group of interactions, Josh and I also have actuallyn’t talked. However you understand what we have actually done? We’ve seen one another within the elevator, the ground lounge, plus the hallway. Numerous times. In most location. And every time, we play an enjoyable game called “Should I Smile and Say ‘Hey’ or Pretend I’ve Literally Never Seen You Before?”
This brings us to my hot take: Floorcest is the enemy and may be prevented without exceptions. Don’t misunderstand me, I’m sure starting up having a floormate is convenient. There’s something to be stated for having to walk not as much as 50 legs to make it to a cock appointment—talk about accessibility. No elevator ride is required before or following the hookup, so the mythological stroll of pity is very nearly completely eliminated. I additionally realize that this experience is certain for me, and that there could be some fortunate Columbians on the market who’ve magically found ways to enjoy floorcest sans awkwardness that is post-coital. But I have actuallyn’t, so I’d argue that convenience is far outweighed by said awkwardness. It’s the things that are small really. If some individuals I’m sure come in the ground lounge, but therefore is Josh, I’ll keep my mind down and return to my space rather than getting together with my floormates that are beloved. If he’s getting for an elevator, I’ll wait for the next someone to avoid the thing I understand would be a painstakingly dry conversation centered on a connection that is feigned. These problems are admittedly negligible, but that doesn’t mean they don’t throw my time just a bit off balance.
To prevent most of these floorcest-related woes, we encourage you, dear audience, to check beyond the breadth of one’s hallway.
It just is not worth every penny. Rather, We state try using a person who lives for a different floor—or better yet, in an unusual building completely. Certain, the increased drive could be an inconvenience that is short-term particularly if the weather is not spectacular or there’s alcohol included. I could empathize with needing to budget for a walk that is five-minute in opposition to a five-second one. But in the long-lasting, we feel confident you’ll thank me personally when you don’t constantly visit your Josh within the elevator. Or perhaps in the lounge. Or within the hallway. Let their flooring be your space—not someplace you need to tell a dick visit of history.